Transform Conflict into Collaboration
You want some inspiration?
The do’s and don’ts of living with empathy, compassion, and integrity
“Thanks!!! I enjoy reading all of them!!” Carol Jean L-Z, Austin, TX
“Oh wow, Elly! How many people have been in your shoes and decided to meet their needs for emotional and financial safety, instead of their needs for integrity????” Diane Emerson, Vashon, WA
Don’t give up
Have you ever planted a seed? Carefully crafted a hole in the ground, planted it, and watered it every day? Have you ever felt that excitement, the anticipation of the moment the first leaves unfold on a warm, sunny day? And then, after days and days, nothing happens?...
Cleaning up and letting go
I'm sorting through my stuff. We might have to move. To a much smaller place. I couldn't take much with me. I'm holding all the books, all the shirts, all the letters, all my small boxes in my hands, and I am choosing which ones I can take, which ones I have to let...
4 Steps to befriend yourself
Last Saturday I wrote how humor can help us take our own desires a bit more lightly, and allow us to relieve some of the shame and embarrassment around our feelings and wants. “Yep, I want to do a striptease, that's just my thing. Haha”. Not to make fun of ourselves,...
What does humor have to do with sex?
Humor helps with intimacy an relationships, and sex is all about relationships and intimacy.
Let’s talk about sex
Let's talk about sex. “Sexual activity motivated by craving always harms myself as well as others”. “Sexual desire is not love”. “Running after wealth, fame, power and sensual pleasures can bring much suffering and despair.” Thich Nhat Hanh's 5 Mindfulness Trainings....
Turning toward each other
Have you ever reached out for connection, and your partner didn't respond? Or walked away? Or talked about a completely different topic? Maybe something like this: “I had seven participants in my class today!”... Silence... (second attempt) “I made $60!”...She walks...
Sorry seems to be the hardest word
“Sorry seems to be the hardest word.” At least, that's what Elton John sings. “Sorry” seems to convey that there is something wrong with us, that we did something bad, and that -as a result of our action- we are unworthy of love, acceptance, and belonging. It is the...
How my bougainvillea can help you understand the difference between needs and strategies
Imagine a bougainvillea. You can imagine any plant you like, and I take a bougainvillea, because I have two in a pot that are blooming excessively. So, we have this bougainvillea and she has certain needs. Universal, precious, plant needs. She shares those with all...
Smile therapy
Have you ever heard of smile therapy? I hadn't. So I invented it. Throughout the day I bring my attention to my facial expression and invite myself to smile. You wouldn't notice the difference probably, my smile is fainter than that of the Mona Lisa, but I do. Just...
Books & Publications
Enjoy!
Leadership Coaching
Explorations into the Being and Doing of Coaching
17 Chapters written by 17 wonderful coaches. One of them is me.
For Clients
Free Webinar “Effective Communication”
What is Nonviolent Communication?
Making Irresistible Requests
These Are Not Feelings
About Elly
Immutable Laws
Terms and Conditions
My Teachers
My Passion