Transform Conflict into Collaboration
You want some inspiration?
The do’s and don’ts of living with empathy, compassion, and integrity
“Thanks!!! I enjoy reading all of them!!” Carol Jean L-Z, Austin, TX
“Oh wow, Elly! How many people have been in your shoes and decided to meet their needs for emotional and financial safety, instead of their needs for integrity????” Diane Emerson, Vashon, WA
Giving advice is not always so helpful
You're sitting down for tea with your friend. She tells you about the latest rupture in her marriage. It sounds shitty. They had a fight, with yelling, disconnection, and thoughts of divorce. Again. She doesn't know how to support her needs for peace, ease, and...
What’s your story?
What's the story I'm telling myself? A few nights ago my husband didn't show up the way I wanted, and we got into a big conflict. My needs were unmet, you know?! And when I don't know how to include them, I get pretty frustrated. Well, maybe more than...
Watering the seeds of happiness
I am inspired to write about watering the seeds of happiness, joy, and love. And I know no one who writes more clearly and profoundly about that practice of appreciation and support as Thich Nhat Hanh. “Whether we have happiness or not depends on the seeds in our...
Dear Thay
“Dear Venerable Teacher Thich Nhat Hanh, Dear Beloved Teacher Thay,...” Even thinking about writing a letter to Thay to ask him to accept me as an aspirant member in the Order of Interbeing brings tears to my eyes. I feel so moved to approach him directly. My hero, my...
Who am I? A glimpse of understanding my true nature.
“Who am I?” That's the first question on my pre-retreat contemplations with my Sangha. Of course, I know the right, enlightened, Buddhist answer: “I am the unique manifestation of continuous presence, impermanent, consisting of self- and non-self elements,...
Grades, autonomy and authenticity
Grades are great of if you get A's, especially if you're among the few who get an A+. Even if you get an A- or a B+ they can still feel good. Grades are less fun when you get a B or a B-, and they start to become painful if you get a C or less. Instead of inspiring us...
The raw beauty of being alive
Let me just cry a little. Being reminded of the loss and love of my cat Toulouse. Watching my nanny kids and their friend pour their soul out as they sing and dance to “Let It Go”, so sincerely, so seriously. Receiving a birthday card and present from my beloved...
Touching Toulouse in the ultimate dimension
I'm reading "Opening the Heart of the Cosmos, insights on the Lotus Sutra" by Thich Nhat Hanh and learning about the historic and ultimate dimension. The historic dimension is the reality as we know it in our current body and is bound by time and space. We are born,...
Puppy training and skillful means
Training a puppy is like training yourself in skillful means. Thich Nhat Hanh describes skillful means as the ability to deliver your message in a way that liberates the listener. It is the skillfulness to adapt your message, so that your friend gets what you're...
Books & Publications
Enjoy!
Leadership Coaching
Explorations into the Being and Doing of Coaching
17 Chapters written by 17 wonderful coaches. One of them is me.
For Clients
Free Webinar “Effective Communication”
What is Nonviolent Communication?
Making Irresistible Requests
These Are Not Feelings
About Elly
Immutable Laws
Terms and Conditions
My Teachers
My Passion