Nourish relationships and self-care

Empathy works. It always does.

Creating results in little steps

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Courtesy to www.clker.comCleaning has something healing to it. Not just the cleansing part, nor the mind-quietening impact. It is also the sheer delight of creating results. The stove is dirty, you clean it, and hup, it shines again. There is instant success.

Today I cleaned the bathroom. I hadn’t done that in a while, and it was certainly ready for a thorough clean-up. I feel overwhelmed. It is so much work. I decide to split up the chore in four parts, and work on other things in between. After the third part I start to feel frustrated. It is not only so much work, I can’t get everything done either, without giving up my other goals for the day.

When I start with the fourth part I decide to clean certain parts, and not others. Just the shower floor, the railing and the bottom row of tiles. I’ll clean the rest of the tiles at another time.

I relax. This is very doable. I can do this with joy. And success.

Setting goals is not only about getting results. It is also about how we get there. We want to get there in a way that is sustainable. If we deplete ourselves by exertion, we’ll never create what we want. We need time to replenish.

Sometimes we want to plan in-between results on our way to the top. We don’t need to get there in one jump. We might have more joy getting there, if we take one step. Then rest. Then another step. Rest. Another step. Till we get to the top.

This is not only true for cleaning. This is also true for relationships and habits. Instead of wanting to see our relationships and habits change all at once, we can set ourselves in-between goals. And then think of one step we can take in this moment to get to where we want to be. Maybe sitting meditation, even for just five minutes. Or calling one potential client. Or eating two chocolates and one apple, instead of three chocolates. And then rest. We can do more tomorrow. Now it is time to celebrate the one step we took. On our way to the top.

And if we never get there? At least we have enjoyed the journey!

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You want help dividing your big project in doable steps? Contact me 512-589-0482. I would be excited to help.

Author: Elly van Laar

I am a coach. I specialize in helping compassionate professionals integrate self-care in their lives. I have a Master's degree in Political Science, Leiden University, the Netherlands. I love meditation, walking, gardening, biking, and hanging out with family and friends.

6 thoughts on “Creating results in little steps

  1. Wonderful space of Soul!.
    Thank you for your Art! .
    HI
    Claude 🙂

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  2. I did enjoy the video. I completely get that change is easier when we intend to make just one little change. If we can succeed at that little step, we feel more encouraged and inspired to take another one. And another one. So we build on our little successes to move us in the direction we want to move in. Thanks for sharing!

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  3. Hi Elly – check out this video about the 10% advantage. Your blog reminded me of that. I hope you enjoy it! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3vYg-Og7jLE

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