Day 4 of my Rejection Day: Today I felt a deep pang of pain in my stomach as I was talking with a friend. I realized how scared I was of rejection, and how I didn’t dare to speak up. Then I asked “Are you sure?” “Are you sure you’re scared?” “Are you sure you might be rejected?”
And I realized: No, I am not. There is some softness besides the pain, some openness to this other human being, some interest in his experience. And I am not so much scared, as just having a woozy feeling in my lower belly. Those are not the same. There is more to me than the fear, more to me than my habitual ways of thinking, more to me than my limitations. There is always this rich fullness of my physical sensations, emotions, thoughts, needs and values, this wholeness of “me”.
Thank you brother Chan Huy, teacher of my Plum Blossom Sangha for asking this question. http://www.mindfulcoachingclinic.com/